Carry Me Home
by Arithese
Summary: The first time the paparazzi found out about Damian was right after Bruce's wedding, but they are all too quick to judge him, and Dick defends him. Rated T for racism and slight angst. Day 2 of the DickDami week


So a little bit of backstory, this is based on my continuous timeline (Therefore the dates), and basically Damian came to Gotham in April of 2018.

Also, as Eurovision is rapidly approaching, the title is taken from the Dutch entry this year, Arcade by Duncan Laurence. (Shamelessly promoting my own country :3)

Enjoy!

* * *

June 26th, 2018. 14:02.

He could do nothing but stare, not even bother trying to keep the tears inside. He let them flow freely, not caring about anyone or anything seeing him cry. He had never cared about that, never cared about being seen as weak, or being seen as a crybaby. He had never hidden his emotion because of shame before.

So why start now?

He cried until his eyes were burning almost painfully, and he felt empty inside. He tried to think it was because of the tears that he had shed, but he knew that that wasn't the reason he felt like this. So empty, so desperate. And he watched with painful, blurry eyes as the coffin was lowered into the ground with an agonising slow speed.

He lost another parent, as much as he tried to deny it, as much as he didn't want to think about it. He had lost another parent, and he couldn't shake off the memory of him standing in front of two coffins all those years ago, allowing people to lower his parents' into their grave. And he knew, remembered, he had felt just as miserable then.

He stayed there until everyone had left. Dick sniffles, wiping away the tears. Not out of shame, but because out of duty. Tim was gone already as well, seeking comfort with his teammates, and Dick was glad he did. Jason hadn't been with them, but Dick had spotted him a few meters away, hiding in the shadows.

He cared, he just didn't want to show it. But Dick knew Jason had Roy and Kory, he would be alright.

Dick turns around, seeing Alfred standing there, next to the smaller boy. Damian… Damian didn't have anyone. The boy was standing there, stiff and tense but there were no tears visible in his eyes. He sighed, walking over to the boy and crouching down. Damian scowled at him, but it was weak, an exhausted scowl.

"Let's go home." Dick whispers. A look of surprise passes Damian's features, before he covered it up.

"With you?" Damian asks.

"If you want to stay with me, that is." Dick adds softly. "If you want I can have your mother pick you up."

"If you need me to look after you then I will." Damian huffs, and if Dick had known Damian better, he would've realised that that was Damian talk for admitting he wanted to stay.

* * *

June 27th, 2018. 08:23

"Are you sure you are willing to do this?" Alfred asks, and Dick nods.

"Gotham needs to have a Batman." Dick says, rubbing his face and glancing at the papers beneath him. "And Damian needs a guardian now Bruce is…-" Dick stops himself but it was clear to both of them what Dick was talking about. Bruce wasn't there to take care of Damian anymore, not like he truly did before his death.

Dick glances down, watching the official papers Alfred had managed to draw up quickly for him. He would prefer to have it done quickly, give Damian some stability in his home. As much as he could give it to him.

"Perhaps it would be wise to schedule a press conference." Alfred comments after a short silence, dropping the newspaper in front of Dick. The first Robin frowns, picking up the paper. It was a picture of Damian and him yesterday at the funeral. Dick was crouching down in front of Damian, with the younger boy looking at him.

_Secret son of Dick Grayson?_ read the headline.

Dick's face twists slightly, eyes roaming over the words on the paper. _Because of course someone managed to sneak in and take pictures_. Dick could feel his stomach turn slightly, couldn't they leave him alone for one day? That's all he asked, one day. But no, not even a day after his father's funeral he had another rumour on his name.

The article talked about the strange boy that had been spotted with him during the funeral, and he guess he couldn't be mad at the fact they thought Dick was the father. He was mad at the fact that they had no compassion for what they were going through right now, they never cared about their feelings with stuff like this.

"Just… not now." Dick muttered, rubbing his face. "I want to finalise the papers first, get everything set up with the company."

"Will you wait until you moved?" Alfred inquires, and Dick sighs.

"That too." He wouldn't be able to be Batman when he wasn't living in Gotham, and he certainly couldn't be Damian's guardian if he didn't live at the manor, and taking the boy to his 1 bedroom apartment wasn't ideal either.

"Just ignore them for now, I don't owe them an explanation." Dick mutteres, standing up and leaving the room.

* * *

July 14th, 2018. 09:26

Damian was scowling, _of course he was_. Dick wasn't even surprised to see the expression, he would've been surprised if he _hadn't_ seen his little brother wear that expression. Dick stops himself for a moment. Little brother, just weeks ago he didn't even think like that. He never denied Damian was his little brother, he knew he was.

He just never.. felt it before.

But as angry and brutal the boy was, he had grown on Dick these last weeks. They had started to work together more as Batman and Robin. The current Boy Wonder made mistakes… he made a lot of them. Gordon had lectured him twice now about the rising medical costs for criminals they had experienced ever since Damian became Robin.

And yet, his performance as Robin was doing him good.

It was an outlet for Damian, and even if it was a slow change, Dick could already see how Damian had changed ever since he came to Gotham, but especially after Bruce's… death. Dick sighs, shaking his head and turning to the current Robin.

"You are not my father." Damian scowled, and Dick shook his head again.

"I'm not replacing your dad kiddo, I'm just your guardian so I can look after you." Dick says softly. "I'm still your brother, this doesn't change anything."

"You are not father's blood, so you are not my brother." Damian bit back, and Dick sighed. _He's only doing this because he feels threatened by me_ Dick mentally reminded himself. Damian only acted like this because he wanted to show his worth by reminding him of his status, not knowing that that didn't determine value here.

"Your father adopted me, which makes me his son. And me being your brother doesn't mean your place here is less secure." Dick said, standing up straight again. Damian just scowls up at him, puffing out his chest a bit but doesn't say anything else. He didn't really have to for Dick to know that Damian still didn't agree with him, his face said enough.

_When had it become so easy to read him?_

"They are ready for you, Master Dick." Alfred interrupted his thoughts suddenly. Dick turns his head around, watching the butler.

"Great, let's just get this over with." Dick comments, glancing at Damian for one last moment before walking past the curtain. The room was filled with reporters, all ready with cameras, notebooks and recording devices.

"Good morning everyone." Dick smiles politely, gesturing everyone to sit down, and luckily they obliged. "I've called for this conference meeting to address the rumours that have been going around these past month, about the unnamed boy."

"Is he really your son mister Grayson?" One lady calls out and Dick shook his head.

"I was getting to that, but no, he's not." Dick denies, turning back to the curtain. "The boy's name is Damian, and he is Bruce's biological son." On cue, Damian walks out of his hiding spot, an evidently nervous face. Or at least, to him is was evident that the boy was nervous, he wasn't so sure if others caught on as quickly.

Damian was good with hiding emotions, on anyone but him and Alfred apparently.

Immediately the room exploded into questions, and Damian almost hesitantly stopped next to Dick, muscles taut and stiff. Dick waited until the room quieted down, before he allowed one reporter to ask his question.

"How old is Damian?" He asks, standing up. Dick didn't glance at Damian, they both knew that Dick was going to answer all the questions. Dick didn't want Damian to do so. Not even because he didn't trust him, but he knew what it was like to be newly introduced to _this _world, a world of fame and where every word was pulled apart and analysed.

And he remembered how terrified he was to speak, or to mess up.

"Damian is 10 years old." Dick answers, turning to another person.

"Where has he lived before this? He has only been sighted in Gotham for the first time a month ago." Dick could feel a slight appreciation for the woman for not mentioning his dad's funeral. He managed a wry smile.

"He lived with his mother until a few months back, Bruce Wayne didn't know Damian existed before that."

"Why didn't he know?" Another reporter, a face as bland as all the others.

"His mother never told Bruce Wayne, and kept Damian for himself." Damian huffs next to him, but didn't say anything.

"So why is he here now?" A woman again, but her voice was harsher, and Dick almost shuddered at the tone in her voice. It was almost accusing.

"His mother was, is still, unfit to raise him. When Bruce discovered he had a son, he took him in. Damian's mother is out of the picture." Damian leaned towards Dick's side, and for a moment Dick thought Damian was seeking comfort until he felt nails digging into his side. Just a second, as a warning now he was under the watch of so many cameras.

_Don't talk about my mother like that_.

As Damian had so often stated before. The younger boy knew how Dick thought of Damian's upbringing. Using words as child abuse, torturous, child neglect and endangerment. But Damian was having none of it, wouldn't allow Dick to talk negatively about her. And the older man had enough scars to vouch for that.

"Why was Damian's mother unfit?"

It was the cover story they were going for, that Damian had been abused by his mother for the first 10 years of his life, and when Bruce eventually found out he had a son, and noticed what his mother did to Damian, he took Damian from her. The court had been handled abroad, and the mother had put up a minimal struggle, almost giving Damian up freely.

"No comment." Dick answered. Because while it was all in the cover story, and known to the authorities who needed to know, it wasn't something Dick wanted out in the world for Damian. Maybe Dick was naive to think he could keep it a secret forever, but he wasn't just giving things out like that.

"As Bruce Wayne's only blood son, is he going to take over the company one day?" Dick didn't even dare to glance at Damian, shaking his head.

"As of now I will be taking over the company with other trusted members, appointed by Bruce himself, and Timothy Drake. Damian is still too young to work." Dick says in the microphone, quickly gesturing to someone else again. There were several more questions, before eventually it was Alfred who called it to an end.

* * *

July 15th, 2018. 08:26

"What the hell?" Was Dick's first reaction. His heart hammered in his chest, and he felt his stomach turn at the new headline. This was worse, so much worse.

"What is the matter with you Grayson?" Damian snapped, and Dick almost didn't dare to look up at the boy, guilt pooling in his stomach. Why did_ he _feel guilty? It wasn't his fault, he couldn't control what the media wrote. And yet, he couldn't help but feel exactly that emotion, overwhelming and crushing guilt.

_Bruce Wayne's son is a terrorist?_

Dick swallowed thickly, sliding the magazine over to the younger boy. Damian grasped the paper, eyes roaming over the page before it morphed into a scowl.

"What is a terrorist?" He asks.

"Not you." Dick affirmed, trying to reach for the magazine again, but Damian pulled it out of his reach.

"Answer me Grayson, what are they implying?" Damian hisses, and Dick didn't even _want_ to explain it to Damian. "I have access to wireless internet, I can find out myself."

Dick swallowed again, knowing that he could. And he would rather have Damian find out from him, than from the internet. "A terrorist is.. someone who commits violent crimes in the name of a political aim." Because that what it was… but not what the magazine was trying to imply here.

"They don't know what I did in the League of Assassins." _How do I even explain this to a 10 year old?_ "Am I a terrorist.. Grayson?" Damian suddenly sounded so vulnerable, so young.

"No, you're not." Dick said again. "It's just that.. because of your skin colour people assume you are a Muslim-"

"But I am not." Damian says.

"But the people out there assume you are." Damian scrunches up his nose, and it almost seemed, dare he say it, adorable. "And with what is happening in the world, some push their fear onto the entire Muslim community."

"That is not fair." Damian tries, shaking his head. Dick sighs.

"It's really not, unfortunately there are people out there who let their thoughts be clouded by fear, and hatred." Dick says. "But you are _not_ a terrorist. Everyone who says so is wrong, and they are judging you by the colour of your skin when they shouldn't." Damian glances at the ground, silent for a second.

"Did they do the same to you when you moved in with father?" Damian eventually asks. Dick shifts in his seat until he was fully facing his little brother.

"They judged that I came from the circus, they judged my heritage but.. never like this. I'm really sorry they are saying this." Dick whispers. Damian was silent for a moment before his face contorted again.

"I do not care what they think." He announces, then without warning he slips off the chair, walking out of the room. Dick didn't have the energy to walk after him. He sighs, turning back to Alfred again, who had been watching silently.

"His ability to lie needs improving I am afraid." Alfred says, and Dick nods.

"Those comments hurt him, he's just too proud to admit it." Dick purposely left out the part about how much it was hurting him as well, but he was sure Alfred already knew.

* * *

July 16th, 2018. 08:16

"Mister Grayson, do you have anything to say?"

"Damian have you read the articles?"

"Richard can you either deny or confirm?"

"Care to comment on-" Dick whirled around, feeling something inside of him snap.

"Yes, I will comment on it." His voice was harsher than normal, a certain venom that he didn't use often. He could see Damian look up to him with a questioning look on his face but he ignored it.

"You're all too quick to judge Damian, he's a 10 year old boy who just lost both his parents." This time, Damian stayed silent, not protesting against Dick's words. "You have seen him once, just one time. And immediately the news is full with theories on what kind of person he is. He hasn't even spoken!" Dick could feel his voice rising but he didn't care.

"Are you saying the accusations are wrong, Mister Grayson?"

"Yes they are wrong!" Dick growled, shaking on the spot. "I've held my tongue for years but you don't go after my little brother like that." He didn't even realise he had wrapped an arm around the younger boy, and now he was just glad that Damian didn't attack him for touching him like that, like he had done before.

Even if Dick had successfully managed to get Damian to stay in his hugs before.

"So you think Damian is capable of taking over Wayne Enterprise?"

"Why wouldn't he?" Dick snapped. "I was never asked that question, neither was anyone else that Bruce adopted. It never mattered that I'm Romani, or that Jason is Latino, or that Cass is Chinese, but now it suddenly does?"

"Grayson." Damian hisses next to him, and Dick glances at him. Dick didn't need to hear more to know what Damian was telling him, _calm down_.

"You don't get to judge based on skin colour whenever you think it's convenient. Damian is his own person, and I know you will be writing about it, this is Gotham-" Dick took a deep breath. "But write about how he is, not how he looks. He doesn't deserve that." Dick wraps an arm around Damian, pulling his little brother a little closer.

Without sparing them another glance, he turned around, walking past the gates of the manor, not looking back as they closed behind him. He kept Damian close, seething from the inside. _Nobody_ talked about his little brother like that. Like he was worth less because of his skin tone, or his heritage, where he came from.

"Did you truly mean what you said?" Damian asks, voice devoid of any emotion. Dick glances at him as they walked inside the manor, and Dick could feel himself exhale finally now they were inside. His tense muscles finally being allowed to relax.

"Every word of it." Dick says, crouching down so he was at the same eye level as his little brother. "You don't have to be what they think you are-" Dick grasps Damian's hand, thumb brushing over the tan skin. "You don't have to be what a handful of people does, you can be your own person. Away from the League, away from our family even. Be your own person."

Damian looks at him for a silent moment, before a soft scowl appears on his face, and Dick almost laughs at the expression, because suddenly it was so easy to see that the scowl was.. _fake, _for lack of better word. It wasn't real, and Damian tried to put it on his face to hide his real emotion from him probably.

He pulls his band back, but much less violent than Dick would've expected him to. He was careful, almost hesitant.

"I will become Batman, it is my birth right." Damian said, tone harsh. Dick didn't pay attention to his tone, only looking at his eyes. The green eyes usually so full of hatred, now filled with a tinge of hesitation, admiration maybe.

"Blood doesn't make you worthy of something Dami."Dick whispers. "I'm Batman, but Bruce isn't my biological father, do you think I'm not worthy of being Batman?" Damian's face shifted at the question.

"Your Batman is sufficient for now." He mutters, and Dick chuckles softly, shifting slightly on the spot.

"We don't know what will happen in the future, you have every right to be Batman if you want, I never wanted to be but Gotham needs a Batman, but-" Dick takes a deep breath, and Damian doesn't interrupt him.

"But you don't have to become him, you don't have to become what your mother wants you to be, or what your father was. You are your own person, and if you don't want to be, you don't _have_ to." Damian still doesn't say anything. "I will never tell you what you have to become later on, do what makes you happy, and if that is becoming Batman, so be it. If you want to become an accountant or something, that's also fine."

"I will be Batman Grayson, and I like being Robin." Damian mutters, and Dick nods.

"That's okay kiddo, if that makes you happy. But I won't be mad if you change your mind, okay?" Damian doesn't react, and Dick smiles brightly. He stands up again, ruffling Damian's hair. The latter grumbles, swatting Dick's hand away. Dick turns around to walk away, but he was stopped by a soft voice.

"Grayson?" Damian asks, and Dick turns around. "Thank you for defending me today, I do not particularly care for those comments but your support is appreciated nevertheless." Dick could see through the lie, the comment had hurt his little brother, despite what he tried to tell Dick right now, but the former Robin didn't comment on it.

He smiled. "Always little D, I meant what I said, you're my little brother, and nobody talks bad about my family." Dick finishes with a broad smile on his face. Damian waits for a split-second, before he nods timidly, walking the other way. Dick watches him go with a slight pang in his heart. But of course one conversation wouldn't change Damian.

And maybe change wasn't the right word either, Dick didn't want to change Damian, he wanted Damian to change himself, by showing him what the League did was wrong, and that there are better ways to keep yourself safe. That family and friends were people you could feel safe with, people you could trust blindly.

He wasn't giving up on his little brother.


End file.
